How to Create Positive Reinforcement Opportunities: Small shifts can make a big difference
By Daniella Mini
There are thousands of books and academic studies on how to promote learning and prosocial behaviors in children. Obviously, there’s not a one-size-fits-all approach or handbook that works for every child in every situation.
Yet there are general principles that every educator and parent can apply. Here, I will focus on the power of reinforcement to promote positive social interactions and play in young children.
What Is Reinforcement?
People sometimes equate reinforcement with calling attention to -verbally or with tangible rewards- a positive behavior you want the child to display more often.
There’s much more to reinforcement than that. For our purposes, it's important to clarify that:
Reinforcement applies to both negative behaviors and positive behaviors.
Your actions, even if meant to reinforce a given behavior, may actually reinforce an unwanted behavior.
Sometimes the best course of action to promote a given behavior is to ignore the child engaging in that behavior and the behavior itself.
Let’s look at a scenario to illustrate how reinforcement works and how to use a few specific strategies.
Scenario:
Jeremy, age 4, likes to build with blocks. The problem is he also likes to destroy, deliberately, his classmates’ block structures.
You want to promote Jeremy’s block-building interest and social play skills while decreasing/ eliminating the problem behavior.
Why Is the Child Engaging in Problem Behavior?
Usually there is no single cause for a behavior, but pondering the possible factors behind it is helpful in knowing how to reinforce what you want to see more of.
Is it a delay in social play skills?
Many 4-year-olds find it fun to build block structures and then destroy them. It’s also an age where all children are learning to play together. Still, the majority of children this age already understand that it’s not OK to destroy what their classmates are building, and refrain from purposely doing so.
Assuming there is no disability or significant special needs involved, it is possible that Jeremy is a bit immature for his age and needs a little more time and support to control his impulse to destroy his classmates' structures.
Is it a way to get attention?
In other words, is attention reinforcing the problem behavior?
It is possible the problem behavior has been inadvertently reinforced when attention is directed at Jeremy every time he destroys a structure. In this case, the behavior may have morphed, in part, into something Jeremy does to get attention.
Is the consequence for the behavior something Jeremy has come to like?
Let’s say Jeremy is removed from the block area and redirected to the art area, kitchen area or sensory table whenever he disrupts his classmates’ play. If so, the behavior could be partially reinforced by this consequence. It could be what Jeremy sometimes does when he’s bored or wants to switch play areas. It’s not a strategy he has “thought through”, but more of a conditioned behavior.
Reinforcement Strategies
Set up for success
First, you need to set the child up for success so you can reinforce with praise, a special activity or a tangible reward.
You will have to be right near Jeremy to do so. It’s also a good idea for Jeremy to play enough distance away from his peers. Every now and then, praise Jeremy and his classmates. For example:
“What a great structure you’re building!”
“Look at how you’re all sharing the blocks. That’s what friends do.”
Perhaps give every child in the block area a sticker for “playing nicely and sharing the blocks.”
You can make comments like, “It’ll be fun to knock over your own tower when you’re done. We only knock over what we build though, not what other people build, right?”
If you see Jeremy getting up or heading toward a friend’s structure, prime him to engage in positive behavior. For example: “I think Mike’s tower is awesome! Let’s look at it together.” Or, “Jane has all the square blocks and it looks like you need more; let’s ask her for a couple.”
Set a few rules and post them
Have a little group lesson on “the block area rules.” Guide the conversation to come up with two to three rules that you can reinforce. Say the rules are:
We can only destroy what we build.
We can’t take a block away from someone’s structure.
Only four at a time in the block area.
Post the list with a picture for each rule and reinforce everyone, including Jeremy, for following the block area rules.
Replace the problem behavior with one that’s socially appropriate
It’s fun to build and wreck structures. Sit with Jeremy and a friend and make a game of it; let's call it “Build and Destroy”. Magnatiles are great for this because you can quickly create big structures.
Give each child a bunch of Magnatiles and tell them, “Let's see how big a structure each one can build in two minutes, and then we can destroy them.” Set a timer and when the timer goes off, each child gets to show what they built and then wreck it.
Believe me, 4-year-olds like this game.
Ignore when necessary
Of course, try to block Jeremy’s attempts to knock down a friend’s structure. Ignore the attempt and redirect Jeremy. As soon as you're able to, give positive attention to the children behaving appropriately: “Johnny, what a cool structure you’re building,” or, “It’s so great how Johnny and Mike are being careful not to knock over each other’s buildings! So proud of you. Here’s a happy face stamp.”
If Jeremy does destroy someone’s structure, redirect him as quickly as possible. Again, give more attention to the child’s whose structure came down than to Jeremy.
Explicitly teach how to share blocks (and everything else)
“There are three way to share,” I tell my students:
You can play together, as when a child plays “restaurant” in the kitchen area with a friend or when children play chase as a group on the playground.
You can divide up materials, like when you give each child some play dough, or when you divide up the legos.
You can take turns, as in, for instance, using a toy car, riding the wagon, or using a swing.
Have a lesson on the “Three ways to share” and then reinforce during naturally occurring situations.
A Small Shift Can Make a Big Difference
In school and at home, it helps to stop and think about how the social environment we create affects children who engage in problem behaviors. Sometimes we’ll find we’re going about reinforcement the wrong way.
Small shifts in approach can help us successfully deploy the power of positive reinforcement.
